Happily ever after… a wedding tale.

by Alison on April 19, 2010 · 3 comments

When I was a little girl I dreamed about having the big fairy-tale wedding. In fact, I spent many a diary describing things down to a minute detail. Wedding colours, venue, food, guests, who would be my maid of honor. I even clipped pages from magazines of what I liked. As I grew, my ideas only became more elaborate and any crush (read: potential husband) I had I would chose ’our song’ (obviously I didn’t LET him know it was our future wedding song… U2 for my high school sweetheart, Shania Twain for another and then Norah Jones for the last one., and he was a real winner that one let me tell you! Man, what was I thinking?! (but that’s a whole ‘nother blog!)
The point is, I believed in fairy tales and to me a wedding signified just that: my very own fairy tale come true where I would marry my prince charming and we would live happily ever after.

Fast forward to today and I am getting married this coming June. Two months away and I have to say, this wedding I spent all these years planning is starting to look nothing like those glossy cut-outs I had collected over the years.  In fact, since having my daughter, a lot of opinions and views have changed.  The girl who once claimed exuberantly ” there will be no budget for the wedding day” suddenly has become “burgers and jeans with a backyard BBQ (hot dogs anyone?) would be perfectly acceptable wouldn’t it????  But why not????  Ok, maybe that’s exaggerating it a bit, I’m definitely not going that route, but I just can not FATHOM spending copious amounts of money for a one day event. I tried to look at wedding gowns but when I saw the price tags it seemed ridiculous! It’s a dress for god sakes!!! Why in the hell would I purchase a dress that I’m going to wear one day?? Sorry folks, can’t do it, lord knows I’ve tried. 

When my mother (who is actually footing the bill for the dress), got the ‘news’ I was going with a fuschia pink prom-style dress with a very nice price tag attached, she actually stammered, “Are you sure? Poor lady has probably saved a small nest egg over the years imaging the cost of my ‘gown’ and my special day. 

I guess that the birth of my daughter  really has brought about some real changes within me, and to what I onced dreamed a dream wedding would be like. I want my day to be special and beautiful, but in a down to earth, warm, inviting way. We opted to go with homemade invites made by my daughters former Nanny, and they are lovely! I just love them!!! We then decided to go with quickie vows and dinner and dancing at our favourite haunt/restaurant, The Superior Café.  Ive never had something there that wasn’t delicious and who needs to worry about décor with a setting like that!

The biggest decision was deciding on fabric for my daughters flower girl dress. Ironically, she is the one who ended up with the big ‘princess style’ poofy dress. Typical. And I fully suspect she will steal the show too, and I will gladly let her be the one to shine! After all, the day is for her and about her… my partner and I have never needed ‘marriage’ to unite us and we certainly knew we would tie the knot one day but weren’t too concerned with when. But when we had our princess – we knew we wanted to all share the same name and solidify our family. To make a commitment to us and our love and to her. Because the gift she has given us: (mind you we bicker more now then we ever have – |its your turn, I changed the last one!!| – yes we argue about poopy diapers, in fact we’ve had raging rows about them), is a wholehearted love. Its made me love him in more ways when I see how he holds her or gently rocks her to sleep. I know he feels the very same things about me as he watches me comfort his daughter. Its like watching both of our hearts walking outside of our bodies and so important for both of us to see the other taking such special care of it.

I am so stoked for this wedding, but in a different way. Its not so much about how good I look, or how fabulous the décor is… its about gathering family, its about spending time, and rejoicing and revelling in this beautiful life we have made with all its up and downs and all its trials– cuz lord knows it wont be easy. But there is something so beautiful, and its even more romantic then I ever dreamed, me getting married in this way, so different from my ideals and girlhood fantasies. I like how Ive changed, and I cant wait to be married!

In a way, my fairy tale dreams have already come true… it wasn’t as glamorous as Id pictured but it has been far more fulfilling and beautiful then I ever dreamed possible!

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Rebecca April 20, 2010 at 11:53 am

That was wonderfully written Alison! You are going to make a stunning bride and I CANNOT wait to see the pictures from your special day. 🙂 I LOVE K’s dress too…soooooo cute!!!

Anne Marie April 26, 2010 at 7:01 pm

So true, Alison. I felt the same way about ours. I figure I am going to spend money on the 10th anniversary, then at least I’ve earned my day!
I am sure you will look stunning in your hot fuscia gown! I can’t wait to see how everything turns out!

Kara A May 6, 2010 at 9:56 am

BRAVO! I will remember this as I plan my second wedding, thank you for a little bit of sane perspective!

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