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Help with potty training daughter

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Help with potty training daughter

Postby Rainydays on Sat Jun 09, 2012 6:54 pm

My daughter is 23 months and we started potty training 2 weeks ago. We have been diaper free since then (except naps and bedtime). Initially things went really well and we had very few accidents as she was indicating (by holding herself between her legs) when she had to go. We had success with pees and poops. After a few days, we had some challenges where I was worried that I was traumatizing her by constantly asking if she needed to use the potty and she would scream if I attempted to get her to sit on the potty. This resolved and we had another stretch of good days. Now, however, she will only use the potty when I suggest it and bribe her with a video on my iPhone. If I let it go too long, she will most often have an accident. Though, there have been times where she has run to the bathroom independently. We are also not having any success with poops anymore. If I'm consistent with putting her on the potty every couple of hours then we are 100% pee trained.

I'm a little confused as to what potty training is supposed to look like. Should she be more independent with it by now? I feel like I'm the one who is trained to put her on the potty every couple of hours, not that she is the one being trained. My mother, of course, has said that I trained myself and didn't have any accidents, but I know she's probably just forgetting since it was so long ago. There has been definite progress from where we started, but I'm unsure if I should continue. I worry about causing her emotional trauma around pottying. Perhaps she just isn't ready (according to the checklists she is, but reality is often different than a checklist). However, I also worry about her being very upset and having her confidence shattered by having to go back into diapers again since she is clearly quite proud of her new status. She is extremely verbal and has told me "Big girls don't wear diapers. I'm a big girl now"; "I don't need diapers anymore"; "I wear underwear like mummy"; "I stayed dry and then I had a pee on the potty, yay, everyone clap now"; "Uh oh I had an accident, you have to clean my bum now".

Any advice from parents who have been there. Does this sometimes takes weeks/months to click in?
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Re: Help with potty training daughter

Postby kattnipp on Sun Jun 10, 2012 2:59 am

If it was me I would keep at it. No point going back to diapers. Our daughter is almost 7 and there are still times that I will tell her to go even though she is sure she doesn't have to. You guys are doing great.
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Re: Help with potty training daughter

Postby Sunnygirl on Sun Jun 10, 2012 8:12 pm

Don't go back to diapers, but yep, it's often the parents who are trained not the kids :lol: It's often closer to age 3 they say before the kids are trained, but depending on the child there could be accidents for years.

Even if it's just you that's trained - think of the money you're saving by not having diapers :D
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Re: Help with potty training daughter

Postby Rainydays on Thu Jun 14, 2012 8:07 pm

Thanks for the reassurance. We still seem to be making progress, just slower than I was led to believe by the 1 and 3 day method books.
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Re: Help with potty training daughter

Postby vicrunner on Sat Jun 16, 2012 12:09 pm

I don't know but maybe this would assist you: best book on potty training is 'Once Upon a Potty'. I used the boy's version but the girl's version looks even better!
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Re: Help with potty training daughter

Postby TazDevil on Sun Jun 24, 2012 9:42 pm

Well you are doing well if she was peeing and pooping at 23 months. :D

Sounds to me like she IS actually now trained and the rest of it is now a control game she is playing.

Potty training is a mental and physical thing for kids to learn but often the whole attention and control part gets in the way.

With mine they weren't ready physically until over 3. Had nothing to do with choice. They had no clue of the signals or how to control them. Once DD figured it out she was trained in 24 hrs with never an accident. DS had accidents until almost 4.

If I were you I would tell her it is her body, her choice. Give her the underwear. Give her the potty and tell her SHE is in control and running the show so she can chose when to go.

If she has accidents, clean them up without a word. We used always panty liners in the bum for underwear. Saved a lot of pairs. :lol:

If you need to remind her use "remember your body" and let her make the choice to remember or mess herself.

Seems like the actual training her body part she has got so the hard part to teach is over.
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