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Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

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Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby LauraB on Thu Nov 14, 2013 2:53 pm

Hi Folks,
So, here I am, single for almost 2 years and I find myself wondering if sending a message to someone on Facebook would be considered creepy?? I'm really attracted to this person and I don't know if sending a message via Facebook is such a good idea. Do people find it creepy to receive a "I'm interested in you" message via a friends page?
I was married for over 20 years and I'm so out of the loop on social media and I'm wondering how something like this would be received.
Thoughts and comments appreciated!!!!!
Laura :?
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby StitchedUp on Thu Nov 14, 2013 3:21 pm

Is this someone you don't actually know? I'm guessing from what you wrote that this is a friend of a friend. If that's the case, I'd consider asking that friend to arrange for you to meet in person in a really casual way. That would give you the chance to see if you're actually interested and if there's a glimmer of interest coming back at you, and then you could suggest getting together for coffee or something similar (you could even do that via Facebook).
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby LauraB on Sun Nov 17, 2013 5:23 am

:) thank you...it's my friends ex, so it makes it a little awkward. Will just chill and hope for a chance encounter. Appreciate your reply.
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby StitchedUp on Sun Nov 17, 2013 7:02 am

Good call. Actively pursuing a friend's ex can be fraught with peril.
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby kapoohhh on Thu Nov 28, 2013 8:41 pm

I met my husband on facebook... When there used to be a chat thing to find people.
Friends ex is something that could effect your friendship.
For me it would be like family. Off limits.
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby wonderwoman on Thu Nov 28, 2013 9:04 pm

Personally I would never pursue a friends ex.
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby Shawna C. on Sat Dec 07, 2013 11:02 pm

wonderwoman wrote:Personally I would never pursue a friends ex.


Oh, this is why I adore you. I was thinking the same thing. Never mind the facebook message thing - there are plenty of guys out there. Why on earth would you go after someone else's ex?!
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby tinkerbelle on Sun Dec 08, 2013 11:17 am

It's an unspoken rule, you don't go after your friends ex'es. No way nohow
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby Island-JJ on Sat Apr 18, 2015 1:02 pm

General rule of thumb:

If you find yourself asking "Is this creepy?" then it probably is
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby blueberry-muffin on Wed Aug 26, 2015 6:08 am

LauraB wrote:Hi Folks,
So, here I am, single for almost 2 years and I find myself wondering if sending a message to someone on Facebook would be considered creepy?? I'm really attracted to this person and I don't know if sending a message via Facebook is such a good idea. Do people find it creepy to receive a "I'm interested in you" message via a friends page?
I was married for over 20 years and I'm so out of the loop on social media and I'm wondering how something like this would be received.
Thoughts and comments appreciated!!!!!
Laura :?


I don't see why not, nothing wrong with letting you know how you feel about a person. All they can do is say sorry not interested in you that way, and you move on.
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby DD_survivor 45 on Fri Jan 29, 2016 4:57 am

As I creeped my way through the site, I have read some pretty interesting and delightful stories!
I came across this post because I had almost the same problem last year. This is a dated post but if this advice finds you well and happy then it's fulfilled it's purpose. :)
My advice? The other folks were right. OMG don't mix and mingle with the exz lol. It's scary. I've been there and done that and trust me, FB is not a gd venue in which to start anything up.
Does anyone ever update there posts here? Well either way, I hope everything worked out for you folks.
TGC. :D
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby dyer on Wed Mar 21, 2018 2:50 am

Island-JJ wrote:General rule of thumb:

If you find yourself asking "Is this creepy?" then it probably is


My thoughts exactly.
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby EricBoss on Thu Apr 26, 2018 11:22 am

Man this is a old topic but I had to restart it because it's NOT creepy.

It's just that it won't be even read at all.

Girls especially hot girls get all kinds of messages.

I'm sure they read them all to give them self a nice boost (I would too)
but there are better ways.

Let's say there is a chance it will be read, then send her something indirect.

More like an invitation and get her to bring a friend so she's comfortable.

Like "Hey my buddy and I were thinking about taking two lucky girls to dinner with us. You are the winner. Seriously though, I think you're cute and we would like to invite you to a night of bowling, dinner, etc'. Only prerequisite is you bring a friend as well so it's a little less creepy".

If she sees your pic / profile and likes it then this will most likely be a date.

Don't EVER listen to conventional dating advice. People are people. Just be yourself so you can connect with someone who is more aligned with you.

PS: It's okay if she's the X cuz I know someone did that in our friend circle and they are now happily living in Mexico. I don't hang out with them but they are doing their thing. They are both kind of like 'sluts' of the group so yeah . . . Like attracts like? No rules, just go with your heart. Be a person. Burn every dating advice you've ever read by any of these female oriented magazines.
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Re: Would it be creepy if I sent a message on Facebook?

Postby EmilySuave on Wed Jan 30, 2019 7:02 am

I don't think it is creepy, but the content in the message can make it creepy. If you don't "attack" the person immediately with I love you or a *certain photo*, if you start a conversation like a normal human - it is not creepy. Everything else - it is.
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